Regrets

I was sitting at the desk at the second gig; things were a little slow and as time went by I kind of started to enter into the in between sleep and awake stage. I started to see images; it was a scene in a place where I’ve hadn’t been for years. It was either a work location or a school. There were a mixture of characters that resembled people from the past. It was like two worlds colliding. The worlds were school days and work location.

I saw that I was standing with a group of friends. Some were friends from my school days, and some were my fellow gov’t Bureaucrat co-workers. We were in the corridor of what looked like my primary school, and some people in the group were going through the door leading to the playground.

Once outside, I could see ES a fellow Bureaucrat worker who I used to talk with. We were on the verge of having a relationship, but I messed it up; at that point in my life my mindset was different and I had other priorities and was a bit more promiscuous so I never paid much attention to how ES felt.  But to my dismay ES ended up going with MB another fellow gov’t bureaucrat who we worked with briefly.

I saw MB, ES and some of my friends heading out the door going to the playground. I walked up to ES and something in my head told me to ask her if she wants to be with me. 

I walked up to her, greeted her and asked her if she is seeing MB; she said no, not really. I said well, because I wanted to know if she wanted to be my girlfriend. She was elated and said that she would love to be in a relationship with me. We kissed and when that happened I could feel her lips and the warmth it brought as I remembered it.

Then a group of my former school friends were coming down the hallway. I didn’t want my best friend DM to see the joy on my face that ES gave me because he will start to tease me and tell the others who will do school yard bullying tactics so that I would be turned off from pursuing the relationship with ES; so I kind of hid it from him. ES told me to go on about my business and that I would see her later; we kissed again and I saw myself leaving the corridor heading out to the playground with my friends.

The feeling of the joy that one feels when they are with someone they loved was briefly transferred from my subconscious to the conscious. This dream kind of reminded me of the women that slipped through my fingers, how would they have made an impact in my life if I had the courage to deal with them as I should have.    

© 2020 All Rights Reserved

Books by True George

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